The comic great W. C. Fields allegedly wanted "I'd rather be in Philadelphia" on his gravestone referencing the joke among vaudeville comedians that "I would rather be dead than play Philadelphia". To be frank, Philadelphia is an uncouth, uncultured, unsafe, and unfathomable place. Perhaps it is due to the fact that we are an outsider that we do not understand the mores and folkways of this strange place filled with people who talk with funny accents and eat disgusting foods.
We can take solace in the fact that we're not going to hell, since we are there now.
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